Feeling good is all that matters. And other bad advice.

Feeling good is all that matters. And other bad advice.

by Stan Faryna

Stan Faryna

In a recent blog post about how to become a better writer, Jack writes, “Just write.”
That’s what I’m doing.
Thomas Aquinas, Pange Lingua. Performed by Coro de Cámara Abadía.
Jack has not given bad advice. Nor does Bill Dorman give bad advice when he explains that Dakota tribal wisdom recommends that a rider dismounts a dead horse. And I’m glad to hear my friend, Billy Delaney is writing and editing. And Dr. Jack King – he’s writing too.
I wonder what Amber-Lee is doing these days. If Carolyn had a good vacation. What ancestral grave is Betsy digging up? What hero or heroine will Sandra be revealing in her next blog post?
Other names, questions, and thoughts come to my attention. But I don’t want to bore you with a list. If your name hasn’t been mentioned, it does not mean you have been forgotten. Or that you’re not on the list.
I appreciate you.
All of you.
For different and individually wonderful reasons.
If I’m not following you on Twitter, read about the Twitter Unfollow Bug and let me know. If I haven’t RT’ed you or made a comment, it is not for lack of heart but rather lack of intelligence. Just remind me that you want me to RT you. Or more. It’s that easy.
A few days ago, I wrote that the only things worth doing are the things worthy of Love. This is something that I believe. This is something I am trying to live.
It’s a mother fucker.
Imagine Samuel Jackson saying that! I am – imagining those words in his mouth. And that does make me grin.
But, honestly, it doesn’t make me feel good to write such epiphanies. Maybe because it doesn’t drop Karma points like a $5 slot machine drops a small fortune. There’s no slot machine bells and blinking lights. No one walks by with a big smile and pats me on the back like they would do when I won a small fortune at a $5 slot machine. Three times.
It doesn’t even make me feel good to tell you that it’s a mother fucker to try to live love out. That’s just honesty. And honesty, like epiphany, isn’t worthy of reward or kudos just because it happens. Honesty, like epiphany, just keeps things coherent.
What a strange phrase to write!
Honesty just keeps things coherent.
In quantum physics, coherence describes all of the properties of correlation between physical quantities of a single wave, or between several waves. But in this regard, I’m not particularly fond of Schrödinger’s cat. I yearn for pure states.
Blessed are the pure of heart…
All of which is to say that doing good does not necessarily feel good in every instance of my or your do gooding. And that is a paradox that inspires me. If something feels good, it may not be doing good in the world. The contradiction invites reflection. That we do reflect upon such contradictions may explain why we do so little good in the world. And why we are not ourselves. Or why we do not know ourselves.
Feeling good is not wrong per se. But I am not defined merely by what feels good. Nor merely by what feels bad. Nor are you.
Outside my window, flickering and bobbing candle lights dot the dark street below as Orthodox Christians return from their Easter Vigil. They move through the night quietly and peacefully and disappear. Like truth in our every day. Coming and going.
I’m reminded of all the times I have turned away from Love, because it didn’t feel nice, rewarding, comfortable, exciting, fun, and/or satisfying.
Did it ever happen to you?
I’m reminded of how I turned my head while watching Mel Gibson’s movie, The Passion of the Christ. When the flogs tore at Christ’s flesh. Blood and flesh sprayed as the barbs pulled free of his body. My turning away from the graphic violence was nothing less than my rejection of Love in all of its splendor.
I long to go and get a little light from a stranger on the street. And keep that little light burning through all the days and nights.

Stan Faryna
15 April 2012
Bucharest, Romania

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7 Responses to Feeling good is all that matters. And other bad advice.

  1. What I am listening to now:

  2. Betsy Cross says:

    So much better getting a good post in my email over Pinterest notifications! LOL!

  3. billdorman says:

    Have you ever eaten dead horse? Me either………….

  4. Stan Faryna says:

    I have eaten horse. In Rome. And then it was sold to me as beef many times by a Hispanic grocery store in college (Los Angeles). And now, it’s happening in Romania. Butchers selling horse meat as beef. But I don’t like to know it when I’m eating it. [grin]

    It was like yesterday. I was happily ploughing through my bowl of traditional Romanian lamb soup. And there was some meat in it that I just wanted to push down my throat before anyone told me what it was. Turned out it was lamb brain. It would have been awfully difficult to be polite and eat my soup had I known during the eating. Sure, I would have done it (eat it), but I wouldn’t have been a very happy camper.

  5. billdorman says:

    I’m definitely a carnivore, but I don’t dig organs of any type….

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