Engage a person. And other social media dohs! 5 minute therapy.

You’re not alone.

Open your mind. Surely, it’s plain to see…

If you are going to get anything out of this blog post, you’ll need to say it with me:

I’m not alone.


Say it with your mouth. If you can do it without disturbing the peace, say it loudly.

I’m not alone.

If you are too proud to say with your mouth, you’re never going to get social media. Or life. Or love! That’s just the way it is.

Last chance to save your soul…

I’m not alone.

Open your heart.

Let love penetrate. Trust me on this for five minutes. Because I don’t want your money. Buy yourself something nice. Or give it to a worthwhile cause.

Here’s some music – if you need a little help. Pump up the volume. You can read on while you listen to the music.

ATB – You’re Not Alone

Less than an hour ago, I received a tweet from Jessica Northey:

@Faryna I love your profile pic/avi! it’s gorgeous! also the love the photo on your blog. Is that your son?? he’s sooooo cute!!! 🙂 xo

I replied:

@JessicaNorthey Jessica: Wow! You know how to engage. I can think of no better first tweet engagement than yours just now.

And I meant exactly what I said. I also followed up with two more tweets:

@JessicaNorthey Here’s a pic of me and my son, Johnny http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=450901373414&set=t.704673414&type=1&theater

@JessicaNorthey Just read your About on fingercandymedia.com. You are amazing. How do you do it all?! Do you sleep? <smile>

This is a beautiful start to engagement. It is an encounter of two hearts – and minds and whole persons. Curiosity, excitement, encouragement… and lots of other good stuff. It’s all there.

How do you engage?

Engagement happens when you understand that you are not alone and you honor the others that share this world with you. Because the ideas, insights, or inspirations shared through social media come from real people. Sometimes.

Engagement can not be counted in the number of tweets, retweets, page views, referrals, shares, likes, etc. Because in true engagement, we don’t know where it ends. It can also transcend time and space.

What about those real people out there? In life as in social media, people are the bottom line as much as you are the bottom line.

Yes, you are the bottom line of amazing. Don’t you forget that!

Stan Faryna
23 June 2011
Bucharest, Romania

If you’d like to connect with me, follow @Faryna and tweet me up on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/faryna


About Stan Faryna

Mr. Faryna is the founder and co-founder of several technology, design and communication companies in the United States and Europe including Faryna & Associates, Inc., Halo Interactive, and others.

Stan Faryna served as a Global Voices author and translator. Global Voices is a non-profit global citizens’ media project founded at Harvard Law School’s Berkman Center for Internet and Society, a research think-tank focused on the Internet’s impact on society.

His political, scholarly, social and technical opinions have appeared in The Chicago DefenderJurnalul NationalThe Washington TimesSagarSaptamana FinanciaraSocial Justice Review, and other publications.

Mr. Faryna also served as editor-in-chief of Black and Right (Praeger Press, 1996), a landmark collection of socio-political essays by important American thinkers including U.S. Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas.


Copyright 1996 to 2012 by Stan Faryna.

Here’s my fair use policy for my content: If you want to share my content with your own audience, you may quote a brief excerpt, if and only if, you provide proper attribution (Source: The unofficial blog of Stan Faryna) with a direct link to the source. Generally speaking, as long as you are not acting as an agent or on behalf of a corporation or institution, I am not interested in any payment for the quotation or use of a complete article. Nevertheless, you may not republish or translate the entire article without my written permission. Send your request for permission via Facebook. Or tweet me up me on Twitter.


16 Responses to Engage a person. And other social media dohs! 5 minute therapy.

  1. vforvaudeville says:

    Fantastic blog Stan!!! I would give it more stars but wordpress doesn’t let me. 😀
    Hopefully this will be like a wake up call for all of us (it is for me….I used to be very social some time ago, I need to get that back :giggle:). There are people at “the other end of internet”, and maybe, like us, they use internet to make new friends, or at least to have a conversation about the things they like. 😉
    I don’t know what this world is turning us into, why are we so scared of each other, of living, laughing…loving. We’re beginning to be afraid of the good things!!!

    So let’s get social people!! Stan offered us the way to start. THANK YOU STAN!

  2. Hey, I can now comment……woooo, love it. One of the things I love about you Stan, is your comments actually demonstrate that you care to engage others fully..not just in a superficial way. Its nice to be able to add my 2 cents over here

    • Stan Faryna says:

      O Happy Day when Stacey Herbert is coming around to my blog!

      Thanks for stopping by and commenting, Stacey. You are a joy to me. I love your passion, courage, and honesty. I’m looking forward to your next blog post!

  3. Thank stan! you made it easy! you are kind, engaging, sweet and smart! My world is better now that I know I share it with you! xo

    • Stan Faryna says:

      Shucks, Jessica! Considering your long list of accomplishments and awesomeness, I have so much to learn from you.

  4. and that song from ATB is one of my favorites EVER! xo

    • Stan Faryna says:

      That song has got me through many a dark night. Sometimes, it played in the most unusual and unexpected places and times – to keep me going. I’d like to think that heaven gives this song a big thumbs up. Maybe ET too.

  5. bonnie says:

    Hello Stan

    This was a great post. It gives me more to think about and it helps me to come out of my shell more. I’m not as bad as I use to be. Thanks to you, I’m talking to a lot more people. My world is bigger. I still can’t believe how you have changed my life and my world.

    But I’m still not there yet. Like I said before I want to get away from being a mommy blogger and grow as a servant leader.

    Your encouragement, guidance and pushing has helped me to connect, share and learn. I’m a better person today. Like Maya Angelou writes in her poem, Still I rise. “Like dust I rise.”

    Thanks for being you. Thanks to you, I rise… “up from a past that’s rooted in pain, I rise.”

    Bonnie Squires

    • Stan Faryna says:

      Thanks for the big love. But you give me too much credit. The truth is that you always had so much amazing in you. I only helped to show you what is inside of you. You did amazing things. And the love you bring is a thousand times more beautiful and brilliant than what I bring to the world. In other words, you rock, Bonnie.

  6. Hollandz says:

    Hey Stan,

    Dig the post. I think engagement is the heart of social media. I’m still learning all the tricks of it’s power, but the one thing that is clear to me it that the people on the other end like to be talked to, not talked at.

    Keep up the good work my man!

    • Stan Faryna says:

      “…the people on the other end like to be talked to, not talked at.”


      Shout it from the rooftops.

  7. TheJackB says:

    You are always consistent in your engagement and to be commended for it. I think that is one of my favorite things about you. It is a gift.

    • Stan Faryna says:

      I’ve been a pebble in your shoe, Jack. Good thing for you, you have a really big shoe. Good for me too.

      I humbly walk in your shadow, Jack. You are about to do greater things than you have every done before. Ajax, you know, was a towering hero.

  8. Stuart Mills says:

    Hey Stan, this is my first time here, but seeing as we’re Triberr buddies I thought I better formally introduce myself 😉

    I like this post – engagement is always something that attracts me, how it works, what is most effective, etc. Sometimes, we naturally are engaged to certain people, so that we’re ‘attracted’ to them and we want to know more. I’m not quite sure how this works, but I believe that those who we are attracted to provides lessons for us.

    They’re there to help us grow as human beings, either by love, or by teaching us lessons that appear to be harsh, but help us uncover more of ourselves. In any case, everyone who we connect with is there to help us become better human beings.

    Take care Stan 🙂

    • Stan Faryna says:

      Thanks for reaching out, Stuart. I agree with you. We recollect ourselves through the world. Through others. In doing good to others. We truly do have much to be thankful for. Thanks be to God!

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