Plz RT! Please! Have you seen Bill Dorman?

Castleville DOHs by Stan Faryna

The best laid schemes of mice and men often go awry.

American and Nobel Prize-winning author John Steinbeck wrote a novella, Of Mice and Men. It tells the tragic story of George Milton and Lennie Small. I reds [sic] it back in high school. Maybe, you did too.

The Hamster Dance

George and Lennie, migrant field workers in California, are buddies during the Great Depression. They got themselves a few modest dreams. The stars do not bless them, but George and Lennie are hard-workers. Things seem to be working out until it all falls apart.

It’s a story that reminds me of myself. I am George. And I am Lennie. And the Lennie in me might not make it- if I don’t keep an eye on me. Lennie likes purdy things. Too much.

What does John Steinbeck have to do with Bill Dorman you might ask? And, duh, what the heck happened to Bill Dorman?

Bill Dorman was the life of the party. He was ubiquitous. He seemed to be everywhere at the same time. Bill was mister social. He was the Hamster Dance personified as a god.

Bill Dorman made us laugh and he made us feel better about things. Everything. Just about. That’s how I remember him. When I think of social, I think of Bill Dorman. He was the last best hope for all that was fun-loving and friendly about social.

That’s how I remember the Hamster Dance. It was one of the first fun-loving things to really go viral on the internet. The Hamster Dance just made everything better. Just like Bill Dorman.

“What is Bill Dorman’s secret?” They would ask each other, one ambitious falsetto to another.

The yellow fog that rubs its back upon the window-panes,
The yellow smoke that rubs it muzzle on the window-panes,
Licked its tongue into the corners of the evening… 

Bill wasn’t afraid to engage. Bill wasn’t pretentious. He was friendly with everybody. Bill showed up even when you didn’t show up for Bill. Bill was like that. He gave and he asked little to nothing in return.

Thank you, Bill Dorman. Thank you, Bill, for being you.

Alas, a star can only shine as long as it has light to give. And a star can burn up pretty fast on the intertubes – if that star burns too bright.

Oh sure – there were signs. The light flickered from time to time. A brief history in time – we knew he was working for something more. Hence, the allusions to John Steinbeck.

The best laid schemes of mice and men often go awry.

It was only unnoticeable to those who don’t know any better. And those that didn’t care. And there was even a Mayan calendar that foretold of the days when gentleman Bill Dorman would stop being the life of the party.

One by one, the stars went cold and dark. The day Arment Dietrich was acquired by Ogilvy for twelve million dollars was a happy day to be sure. Everyone was glad to see Gini get her much deserved and rich reward. I shouted woo-hoooo from the rooftops. But life is complicated, and we never heard from Gini again.

There were false teachers and false prophets: healers that could not heal and leaders that could not lead. They were afraid to love us. They loved themselves, just fine. Yeah, it was that obvious and that simple.

Stars fell from the sky like unripened figs. Zombies were all the rage – especially the ones that wore a poker face and spoke gaga muh-muh-ma like they did in paradise. Or so we are told.

Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

The poet warned us. RIP Dylan Marlais Thomas.

Oh- Whitney! Didn’t we almost have it all?!

In the immortal words of Eric Cartman, Bill Dorman threw down the gauntlet on the first day of Christmas- twenty twleve.

“Respect my authoriteh!” he said. That’s the story that me and TheJackB are sticking to. There is no need to mention the speedos.

Alas, Bill Dorman would not get his five golden rings – not even the one to rule them all.

But there are rumors, now and then, of a man that drives a black Porsche Cayenne. S. There are rumors and gossiping in the orange groves of Orlando – rumors of a sharp dressed insurance man in a bespoke suit and spit-shone shoes that make the suit.

They say he wears his Burger King crown with pride and dapper do and he shoots clay pigeons bang-bang-bang at the golf course – of all places! And when the smoke clears, the torn thumbnails of bloggers and twitter folk are still fluttering like dust in the wind.

Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light


Stan Faryna

24 February 2012
Bucharest, Romania

Stan Faryna


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20 Responses to Plz RT! Please! Have you seen Bill Dorman?

  1. Hi Stan, Yes, Bill Dorman, John Steinbeck and Castleville. Isn’t everyone writing about those three topics? No? Are you saying your imagination outshines all of ours? You are correct!

    I’m no Bill Dorman expert, but I have noticed some clues.

    1. He got an iPhone at the end of last year. Perhaps he got absorbed with one of the many apps I’ve recommended at The Wonder of Tech. My bad.

    2. He won a new TV in a golf tournament. This could have led to two possible outcomes. First, perhaps Bill has joined the PGA Tour in the hope that his outstanding golf skills (two holes-in-one in one year) would earn him slightly more than his insurance gig. Or, second, he has discovered the cutting-edge tech known as television. Television can be a time-waster, trust me.

    3. He discovered Pinterest. That’s right, Pinterest is the biggest time-sucker of all time. I wrote an article about it yesterday that took me 10 years to complete because of all the time I spent looking at pretty pictures. Okay, maybe not 10 years. But it did take a while due to the distracting nature of the beast.

    You might notice that all of my clues relate to tech. I’m not sure whether that’s because:
    a) tech is all I think about,
    b) personal experience, or
    c) because tech is the answer to all questions.

    Of course, Bill could just be busy with other stuff. I hear there’s a real world out there somewhere, but I wouldn’t know, I don’t have time to explore it.

    Have a great weekend, Stan!

    • Stan Faryna says:

      You win! My heart. Today!

      Thank you for making me laugh. You understand me so well.

    • billdorman says:

      I did hear #billdorman was trending; you might want to get on that band wagon early just in case it gets crowded…..:).

      If you go to Shonali’s post about being tired there is a lot of that in me right now. I’m not tired or sick. or sick and tired, but my plate is extremely full right now. I’ve allowed myself to over-commit and have a transition year as I wrap up some commitments while I’ve already started with some new ones.

      All doable, I just need to be more purposeful with my time. Therefore, I haven’t really gone anywhere, I just need to get better as saying no to allow myself enough ‘me’ time in there too.

      All in all I am in a very good place right now. My day job is good, my volunteer efforts are fulfilling and I’m still the king of social…:)

      Thanks for the kind words and support, very much appreciated.

  2. I blame it all on Ogilvy. Those bastards spend all there money acquiring smaller agencies and look what happens. 😉

  3. billdorman says:

    Stan the man, what can I say? This was quite the surprise for a Fri morn. It certainly made me smile and even brought a tear to my eye.

    Yes, I’m not out there chasin’ as much as I was but I am in a good place w/ my social now. As we know, social can be very fickle so I had to find a sustainable level.

    I’m in my car responding to this as I’m walking into a meeting; but you did made my day. Thanks for the ‘feature’.

    You are the man!

  4. The last mouse that roared… he…he…heee!! 🙂

  5. I LOVE BILL DORMAN! Even when he shows up in a Speedo at a business conference. That was kind of embarrassing, but he made up for it in free drinks for all. In fact, that was the night his BlackBerry died (true story) and he opted for the iPhone. Perhaps Carolyn is right…that’s what caused his disappearance. Had I known that would happen, I would have stopped him!

    Also, let it be known, if I sell my company and make $12MM, you will find me on the ski slopes…not behind my computer screen.

    • billdorman says:

      That was kind of awkward, but after I dried off from falling in the pool and killing my phone and got enough drinks in me, it became a little more comfortable in my own skin. But yes, obviously the water was cold…..:)

      I won’t tell anyone our little secret and how $12MM is a mere pittance to our little nest egg; but maybe we can use that to take care of taxes or something.

      You know I love you too, you da best.

  6. alaskachick says:

    Gini means she’ll be on the ski slopes AFTER she comes to visit her pal in Alaska! (Geeze)

    Bill? Bill who? Ooohh, you mean that sweetie that used to ask me all sorts of embarrassing questions ON MY BLOG?! Oh. Last I heard, he was off shootin strange little wooden ducks… Maybe one of them wasn’t wooden after all… MAYBE someone took hom for a wooden duck…

    Strange though… above, he was in his car…walking to a meeting… I think that sums it up.

    BUT! Carolyn is probably right…she seems to make a habit of it.

    • billdorman says:

      Somebody said duck and I thought they said ‘pull’ and I don’t know what happened after that………:). Duck, pull, I don’t know which one……….

      The day job and some of commitments have my plate pretty full right now. I can try to be king commentor or I can write or I can try to do a little of both, which is where I am right now. Just as you struggle with your internet, I still struggle how to balance my presence because I do like the people.

      Thanks for stopping by; I’ve tried 4 times to leave another comment (instead of a reply) and it’s not working for me. Hmmmm…..

      Hope you have been well and had a great week.

  7. Bill who? hahahahahahaha. Just kidding. You know I love ya. And Stan, this post rocks! Cheers! Kaarina

    • billdorman says:

      Bill who is right; I think he was the invisible one…..

      Stan’s post did surprise me and somewhat humbling; but Stan put a good spin on it.

      Thanks for dropping by; you know I’m still around, just in a more sustainable version these days…….:)

  8. Loved that Video clip Stan. Memories of mice that roar…
    Really good reply, you got the reference too, love that!

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